Blessed, Loved, Rejoicing, Joyful

Isaiah 45:3 - He Calls Me By Name

Good Morning Ladies!!! 

I am so thrilled to be here with you again for yet another amazing blog hop. This week I decided to take our 'verse of the week' Isaiah 45:3 and verse map / verse chain with you. 

I was really excited with the messages this week. Our value is not determined by a silly number. It made me step back and think about my true want/need/desire to really go through this study. Did I want to be skinny? "Attractive"? More confident? These were my first thoughts. And then I realized that no, that's not my deep want. That's not my ultimate goal. I want to crave GOD more than I crave chocolate. I want to crave GOD more than that cupcake in the break room. I want to crave GOD more than I want to rely on any food to fill a void that only HE can fill. I want to be healthy, not just in my body, but in my relationship with God. And I know that no matter how far I get, what goal I achieve, or what goal I fail at... God will be there. He knows me by name, he favors me, he supports me.  

Isaiah 45:3 Verse Map

Isaiah 45:3 Verse Chain

 I just wanted to leave you with a little message that really spoke with me this week. One Sonic Society's song Never Once. 

Never once did we ever walk alone, Never once did you leave us on our own. God you are FAITHFUL. 

 

Determination

“We were made for more than this. More than this failure. More than this cycle. We were made for victory.” Lysa TerKeurst, Made to Crave

     Last week I wrote about my weight loss journey that began last year, and today I wanted to share a small (but large to me) victory. Everyone knows how much they dread getting their drivers license photo taken, no matter how much time prepping in front of the bathroom mirror, no matter how much time spent blow drying and flat ironing that lovely mess of a mop we call our hair, that picture is always HORRID! How do they do that? It's like they take a special training course on how to take the most unflattering picture. Well today as I patiently sat waiting in the longest line ever at the DMV, I thought, no matter what this picture has to be better than the last. As I sat in the chair, answered the questions (Yes, I am an organ donor) and saw that lovely flash that seems to be as bright as the surface of the sun, I smiled.  It was refreshing to hear the clerk look at me and say "Wow, you look great! Look at your picture." Looking back at me on that little screen was the old me, and the new me. I can't tell you how good it felt to see HALF of the old me looking back. My face was half as wide, skin bright, and a great confident smile. No more giant double chin, no more blotchy skin, no more awkward half smile.

“Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NLT

 I left the DMV, not discouraged, but with an entirely new sense of determination, because the next time, I'm looking forward to looking at the new HALF me.  It made it a little easier to grab that water and eat my pile of steamed cauliflower for lunch and graciously ignore the pile of cookies in the break room. I'm fighting this fight, not for beauty, not for you, not for acceptance, but for me. Fighting for my health, my confidence, my family. 

I know how easy it is to put off working out or to not want to cook dinner tonight.  I work nights and I'm telling you that working night shift in an ER/ICU will at times make you consider physical harm to someone who comes between you and caffeine or that sugary snack. Self control is a choice. I choose to get healthy.  

P.S. Say a little prayer for our weight race team, initial weigh ins are this week... EEK!

Permissible But Not Beneficial

Just because something is permissible doesn’t mean it is beneficial to us. Yes, the truth hurts sometimes, and with the Made To Crave bible study, so much truth has been thrown right at my face. I'm broken and bruised but will come out a much better person. This has been a sore subject with me since college, an on going battle not only with weight/health, but all the confidence that comes with it.

Last year my boyfriend and I went on a weight-loss journey, and it was AMAZING. I have not felt this good since high school. He lost 164 pounds.... yes, you read that right... 164 POUNDS!! I am dwindling along right around 70 lbs, I still have quite a way to go but I'm really proud of myself so far. We bought a food scale, measured out every single thing we ate, cut out all the bad things (we still had a cheat day, no worries...), had all the fancy fitness apps to log our run times and distances, got a weight bench to tone all the flabbies when the skin got loose, and just went at it with everything we had... which brings me to this weeks topic: Permissible but not beneficial. 

I work full time in an acute care setting, I also have two casual positions (one in an LTAC and one in a sleep lab) where I pick up extra hours. I can't tell you how many days I come home from a 12+ hour shift with a 1h15m commute each way and say to myself- "It was a really long day, you are so tired, just skip running this morning." "You really need to get some sleep before work, just cut out that last set."  or "It's too late, you don't have time to cook dinner, just grab something on the way to work." And I could go on for days but you get my drift. It's permissible, but not beneficial.

It's been a real fight to face the fact that I'M MAKING EXCUSES.

I'M MAKING EXCUSES!

 

I can't hide it, I need to fight it! I'm glad I can join you girls, I'm glad that someone out there is going to hold me accountable, and that I'm going to have God on my side. I'm diving in with my head held high!

The Real Me...

Hey everyone! I must admit that I am really excited about this weeks blog topic. I'm not going to lie, I thought it would be really easy at first, but the more I thought about it, I became absolutely terrified! Who am I? Who is the real me? I immediately found myself falling right back into those same self-doubt filled emotions. I'm not anyone special, I'm just some plain old girl that's not really good for anything. So I gave myself a swift kick in the rear and picked up those broken pieces and put them back into my personal little puzzle.

So Who am I exactly?

Well, I guess we can start on the surface and dig down as we go. I'm Kira. I am what some would call an extreme example of the stereotypical female. My favorite color is pink, I like sparkly things, puppies, and getting my nails done. It is impossible for me to make it from point A to point B without getting lost, as a matter of fact I'm not exactly sure how people ever drove anywhere before the GPS was invented. I have an undeniable type A personality, which basically means I'm ambitious, I usually take on more than I can handle, I'm proactive, and I can be considered a workaholic (good thing I love my job). It also means that I am sometimes impatient, overly sensitive to the silliest things, and highly competitive. (Hey, we all have our downfalls right?) I have outrageous organizational skills and attention to detail. Bad grammar makes me feel like I'm bleeding from my ears and has the ability to make me irrationally irritated. I'm nearly a 100% extrovert, meaning I'm not shy in the least bit. I love meeting new people and making new friends.

I love my job, I'm a respiratory therapist, I work in a critical care setting (ICU) which means I take care of patients (and their families) when things are looking the worst. I love helping people heal and see them get back to their normal lives. As part of my job, I'm the one responsible for "pulling the plug", it's something that I struggle with daily, it's never easy and I'd be lying if I said that it didn't take an emotional toll on me. I often struggle with the feeling that I'm not doing the right thing or that I could have done more. As you could imagine this part is also hardest for the families. To provide comfort for them while single handedly removing their loved one from the only thing keeping them alive is stressful and emotionally exhausting. I experience joy and pain on every single shift. I feel what they feel, and I do my best to offer as much comfort and help as I possibly can, I only pray that it is enough. 

I volunteer my time every year to a children's summer camp for kids suffering from asthma and other pulmonary issues. I lead an educational group, help kids discover their triggers and monitor their symptoms. It's so rewarding to see them come back year after year, having fun, learning, growing into young men and women. Of course it does not hurt my feelings to spend the week at an amazing christian camp and conference center. :)

My strengths... well, they are also sometimes my weaknesses. I have a strong attention to detail, which sometimes means that I over analyze even the smallest things. I'm a critical thinker, but sometimes tend to over think and complicate even the simplest of tasks. I have a great ear, I listen well and I'm the usual outlet for the fears and thoughts of my family and friends. I usually offer great advise, although I rarely follow it myself. I have the ability to see both sides of an argument, it sometimes gets frustrating when it comes down to 'picking a side' during debates and arguments, because I normally see right and wrong in both instances.

I am strong and fiercely independent. I am a sister, a daughter, a friend, a counselor, a teacher, a healer, and I am a child of God.

Romans 8:1

There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the spirit. -Romans 1:8

Unpacking Romans 8:1

Condemnation: Accusation, Denunciation, Disapproval, Judgement. 

Therefore now no condemnation: Our sin, the cause of our condemnation, is REMOVED. Christ bore the condemnation for our sins HIMSELF. 

According to the flesh: Corruption of nature/ corruption of man. Persist in a continued pattern of sinning.

According to the spirit:  Holy spirit of God. Enter a spirit of grace, MAKE GOD OUR GUIDE! Follow God's influences, dictates, and directions. 

Who I Am...

"The more you reaffirm who you are in Christ, the more your behavior will begin to reflect your true identity" -Dr. Neil T Anderson.

     Let's face it... We have ALL struggled with doubt, insecurity, that nagging in the back of our minds that constantly tells us we are not good enough. I've often asked myself questions like "Why and I not good enough?", "What's wrong with me?", "Why am I such a failure?". We are told in 2 Corinthians 10:12 that those who "measure themselves and compare themselves with themselves" are not wise.

     
     It's so easy to fall into the same patterns of condemning ourselves and comparing ourselves, that we have convinced ourselves that if we were richer, prettier, smarter, etc... That if all these were true we would be content, happy, that we would finally be good enough. God does not want us to say these things to ourselves. We are told in Isaiah 62:3 that we are "a crown of splendor in the Lord's hand, a royal diadem in the hand of God." We do however, have the enemy of Satan knocking at our door wanting us to fall back into the self-doubt shadow. Satan is the father of lies; there is no truth in him (John 8:44).

If we have put our trust in Christ as Savior, we can stand on the promises of who we are in Him - Chosen, Holy, and Dearly Loved.

Who Am I In Christ?

I am accepted.
I am God's child. (John 1:12)
I am a friend of Jesus Christ. (John 15:15)
I have been justified. (Rom. 5:1)
I am united with the Lord, and I am one with him in spirit. (1 Cor. 6:17)
I have been bought with a price and I belong to God. (1 Cor. 6:19-20)
I am a member of Christ's body. (1 Cor. 12:27)
I have been chosen by God and adopted as his child. (Eph. 1:3-8)
I have direct access to the throne of grace through Jesus Christ. (Heb 4:14-16)


I am secure.
I am free from condemnation. (Rom. 8:1-2)
I am assured that God works for my good in all circumstances. (Rom. 8:28)
I cannot be seperated from God's love. (Rom. 8:31-39)
I have been established, anointed, and sealed by God. (2 Cor. 1:21-22)
I am confident God will complete the good work He started in me. (Phi. 1:6)
I am a citizen of heaven. (Phi. 3:20)
I am hidden with Christ in God. (Col. 3:1-4)
I have been given a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. (2 Tim. 1:7)
I am born of God, and the evil one cannot touch me. (1 John 5:18)


I am significant.
I am a branch of Jesus Christ, the true vine, and a channel of his life. (John 15:5)
I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit. (John 15:16)
I am God's temple. (1 Cor. 3:16) I am a minister of reconciliation for God. (2 Cor. 5:17-21)
I am seated with Jesus Christ in the heavenly realm. (Eph. 2:6)
I am God's workmanship. (Eph. 2:10)
I may approach God with freedom and confidence. (Eph. 3:12)
I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. (Phi. 4:13)


     When doubt comes against me, saying I'm not good enough, I will rely on the truth that God is for me! He says I'm fearfully and wonderfully made; all of His works are wonderful and I am one of them. (Psalm 139:14)

     So who am I? I am beautiful and I am a masterpiece. I am royalty. I am strong and courageous. I am precious. I am a conqueror. I... I am a CHILD OF GOD.